betrayed.... random poems i found online that says how i feel

This poem expresses what happens when a guy and girl friendship has to come to an end and proves that old saying "guys and girls cant be just friends"
Sunshine
© Kahlen
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Who would have thought we'd be best friends?
Who would have known on you I could depend?
Who could have saw it would end so fast?
Now our strong bond remains in the past.
You were there for me as long as it worked for you.
I never realized how much I depended on you.
You've gotten lost in someone who is not worth your time.
I guess along the way I forgot you weren't "mine".
Now the person I thought you were has left my sight...
I swear, I tried so hard to keep us strong, I held with all my might.
When I finally got the nerve to tell you how it made me feel,
you tried to keep your heart from seeing it was real.
You let me walk out of your life and you didn't even know.
I think inside you had convinced yourself I'd never go,
Everyone always says guys and girls can’t be just friends anymore.
We always used to laugh it off; I guess in our hearts we thought we were so sure...
Yet here I am, saying goodbye.
I gave it my all, I had to try,
and though I'm still around and you see me every now and again
soon you'll see... you've lost your best friend.

The hardest part of any friendship is when it's time to say goodbye. As much as we might like things to stay the same, change is an inevitable part of life.

A thousand times you said you care
A million times you tell you’ll be there
A hundred times you said you loved me
But a billion times you left me nowhere.

I trusted in you with my eyes closed
Being with you was dancing in the sky
Sharing with you was laughing all time
Keeping you close was happiness in my heart
But without you I’m nowhere

I don’t know if you really deeply care
Now I just see fake smiles, broken hearts
I lost your hand in the middle of my way
I can’t find the way out in this dark empty space

I’ve lost almost the best people I’ve had
Continue with you is just being disappointed once again
Like the old times when I was just a ghost for you
The way I always felt, hiding by your invisibility cloak

I just wish I won’t exist
So you can continue your life without thinking of me
I just wish I could disappear
And no more problems with me

Hating to left you
You were absolutely the best
But other people deserve you more
And you actually love her more

So goodbye, it was my pleasure
You were a good friend this time
But as life comes on people always
Run out of your lives, goodbye.
Love Always,
Nickie

things to do...

WOw i have so much shit that needs to get done. I have to call unemployment today between 5-6, tomorrow his teacher is coming to thew house for her 2nd yearly visit to the house and then friday i have to go to FIA at like 8 am to get on food stamps since every money situation i have is just taking forever. GRRRR! plus jake needs to get back on medical insurance. I hate not having him insured b/c i know he'll be the one to break him arm or need stitches or something stupid. I'm irritated about my car and am really hoping that it's fixable
Love Always,
Nickie

Getting irritated

I feel I've been really patient with Tony when it comes to child support. I've left him alone about being in so much debt, I don't care that he doesn't see Jake. I just leave him alone I don't ask for anything I don't threaten to put him in jail or anything like that. I feel I've been extremely understanding about him abandoning his son but come on enough is enough. He owes like $16,000 and even though he doesn't pay it, I am still responsible for making sure Jake has everything he needs. I know a lot of guys bitch about having the child support money they give women being spent on themselves but if you think about it, who's to say the $20 SHE took from her wallet to buy the child shoes wasn't money she was going to use for something she needed so when the child support comes in she uses $20 of that for what she originally needed. Its a thought going through my head right now b/c that used to be something he bitched about from his first baby mama. But it's amazing that he owes me enough money that i would be completely set for a year at least with taking care of everything. It's insane and i have no idea what to do about it.
Love Always,
Nickie